Sometimes young people encounter problems which may be too difficult for them&endash;or for anyone&endash;to handle without some help. Following are signs of serious problem issues and suggestions regarding sources of help.

Severe Stress

Severe stress, especially that which occurs at an early age and is intense enough to have a lasting effect, can lead young people to ignore their internal centers of self-affirmation and self-control, and seek outside approval as a means of creating a safe environment, reinforcing their self-worth, and defining their identities.

Signs of Severe Stress

• dependence on others for feelings of worth and identity
• feelings determined by outside events
• search for validation from outside self
• repression of feelings and emotions
• refusal to communicate feelings
• denial of pain
• repression of memory
• state of constant crisis
• assumption that stress is normal
• use of crises as distraction from emotional pain
• maintenance of relationships with "needy" people
• inability to say "no"
• tendency toward isolation
• lack of confidence in own judgment
• sense of being "alone" in group
• need to appear emotionally strong and not in need of help
• sense of shame
• self-neglect
• inability to set limits
• perfectionism
• possessiveness
• maintenance of relationships with abusive people
• passive formation of friendships
• assumption of others' responsibilities
• over extension

How to Help

• express feelings and concerns without judgment
• listen with respect and understanding
• recognize and reflect the person's strengths and positivebehaviors whenever possible
• seek professional help

Sources of Help

• private health care provider
• member of clergy
• school counselor
• social service agency
• Spokane Mental Health .................................. (509)-838-4651